I removed all the doors to our love, so you can’t lock your… - Jarod Kintz

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I removed all the doors to our love, so you can’t lock yourself away from me. But I didn’t stop there. I also replaced the doors with metal detectors, so I could fondle you more efficiently, like the highly trained professionals do who run airport security.

Jarod Kintz

At even one penny, this book would be overpriced. In fact, free is too expensive, because you'd still waste time by reading it. · 2012 Verified in 1 source Sign up to see the complete provenance

English

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About Jarod Kintz

Jarod Kintz is an American author of absurdist humor, known for self-published collections of surreal one-liners and random thoughts. His prolific, often meta-titled works include "This Book is Not for Sale," "99 Cents for Some Nonsense," and "This Book Title is Invisible," published largely through Amazon Kindle. Widely quoted online for his deadpan, nonsensical voice, he describes himself as a writer, absurdist, and duck farmer based in the American South.

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Originators like Jarod Kintz:

Groucho Marx Woody Allen Brandon Boyd Steven Wright Margaret Atwood

Additional quotes by Jarod Kintz

Love is like a summer rainstorm in winter. Where I’m from that’s called romance. Where you’re from that may be called snow.

I chased the chaste, and they got scared and scurried. Then I stood still and loved where I was at, and all approached without fear of reproach.

I’ve got a flesh-colored tattoo. I drew it myself. You should see it sometime, if only you could see it (it’s invisible).

I removed all the doors to our love, so you can’t lock yourself away from me. But I didn’t stop there. I also replaced the doors with metal detectors… - Jarod Kintz

About Jarod Kintz

Additional quotes by Jarod Kintz