I met my girlfriend at a bar. But I broke up with her because she was already there, hitting on another guy. - Jarod Kintz

Scars exist to show that I existed. I myself don’t have any scars, but every single one of my friends has a healed up knife wound deep in their back.

I must be a great leader because many people follow me. Most of the people are police officers, if that gives you any indication of my character.

Sometimes I get depressed about my age. In March I’ll be 26. If man weren’t measured in numbers, but rather letters, I’d be turning Z. And then I’d be dead.