Male or female, if my name were either Don or Dawn, I’d be … - Jarod Kintz

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Male or female, if my name were either Don or Dawn, I’d be up at sunrise to celebrate the glory that is me.

Jarod Kintz

99 Cents For Some Nonsense · June 16, 2012 Verified in 1 source Sign up to see the complete provenance

English

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About Jarod Kintz

Jarod Kintz is an American author of absurdist humor, known for self-published collections of surreal one-liners and random thoughts. His prolific, often meta-titled works include "This Book is Not for Sale," "99 Cents for Some Nonsense," and "This Book Title is Invisible," published largely through Amazon Kindle. Widely quoted online for his deadpan, nonsensical voice, he describes himself as a writer, absurdist, and duck farmer based in the American South.

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Groucho Marx Woody Allen Brandon Boyd Steven Wright Margaret Atwood

Additional quotes by Jarod Kintz

I’d like to file a missing person’s report — on my clone. It’s nearly 2012. He should have been here by now.

The best way to guarantee you have a job tomorrow is to not finish all the work your boss asked of you today. Wait, that’s not right. Sorry, I’m thinking like a government employee again.

I walked to work. I paced up and down the bus looking for a seat. Next time I walk to work I’m getting on my treadmill.

Male or female, if my name were either Don or Dawn, I’d be up at sunrise to celebrate the glory that is me. - Jarod Kintz

About Jarod Kintz

Additional quotes by Jarod Kintz