But, ah, the energy we spend hiding from one another, afraid as we are of being identified.

We have fallen out of belonging.

We look for this security by fortifying and enclosing ourselves in innumerable ways. We want the protection of being “exclusive” and “special,” seeking to belong to the safest church, the best nation, the highest class, the right set, and the “nice” people. These defenses lead to divisions between us, and so to more insecurity demanding more defenses. Of course it is all done in the sincere belief that we are trying to do the right things and live in the best way; but this, too, is a contradiction.

We are difficult to come by and a danger to ourselves.

Because we are separated everything separates us, even our efforts to join each other.

We have to belong to ourselves as much as we need to belong to others. Any belonging that asks us to betray ourselves is not true belonging.

When we feel like we belong we feel connected and we feel safe. As humans we crave the feeling and we seek it out.

Many people suffer from the fear of finding oneself alone, and so they don't find themselves at all.

Fear makes us run away from each other or cling to each other but does not create true intimacy.

The fear of finding oneself alone – that is what they suffer from – and so they don’t find themselves at all.

Sometimes we try so hard to change ourselves and the way we react to those around us that we forget that it should not be this hard to belong.

That is, to be ourselves causes us to be exiled by many others, and yet to comply with what others want causes us to be exiled from ourselves.

We want our freedom; we want to be ourselves, but we are also afraid to be by ourselves.

The more you know about exclusion, the more you think about belonging. We have a crisis of belonging in this country.