"When a guy at the urinal says to me, "If you shake it more than twice, you're playing with it," I like to look over at him, grab his ass, and say, "… - Jarod Kintz

"When a guy at the urinal says to me, "If you shake it more than twice, you're playing with it," I like to look over at him, grab his ass, and say, "Shh. I'm about to cum.

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About Jarod Kintz

Jarod Kintz is an American author of absurdist humor, known for self-published collections of surreal one-liners and random thoughts. His prolific, often meta-titled works include "This Book is Not for Sale," "99 Cents for Some Nonsense," and "This Book Title is Invisible," published largely through Amazon Kindle. Widely quoted online for his deadpan, nonsensical voice, he describes himself as a writer, absurdist, and duck farmer based in the American South.

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Additional quotes by Jarod Kintz

Question for your life: Let’s say we’re making love on the moon, and my clone decides to show up. Would you tell either me or him to get lost?
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When your family dies, that’s a bummer, but that’s life. When my family dies, it’s a tragedy and the world is unbalanced and biased.
This Book Has No Title · March 22, 2012 Verified in 1 source Sign up to see the complete provenance
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