38 Quotes Tagged: paraphrased

Speak softly and employ a huge man with a crowbar.

I have not failed. I've just found 10,000 ways that won't work.

I believe I am in Hell, therefore I am.

"We didn't land on plymouth rock, Plymouth rock landed on us".

I would never die for my beliefs because I might be wrong.

Blessed are the cracked, for they shall let in the light.

To lose one parent, Mr. Worthing, may be regarded as a misfortune; to lose both looks like carelessness.

The proper study of Mankind is Everything.

Bad men need nothing more to compass their ends, than that good men should look on and do nothing.

I have something that I call my Golden Rule. It goes something like this: 'Do unto others twenty-five percent better than you expect them to do unto you.' … The twenty-five percent is for error.

Science advances one funeral at a time.

All these people talk so eloquently about getting back to good old-fashioned values. Well, as an old poop I can remember back to when we had those old-fashioned values, and I say let's get back to the good old-fashioned First Amendment of the good old-fashioned Constitution of the United States — and to hell with the censors! Give me knowledge or give me death!

Everything must be made as simple as possible. But not simpler.

I am only one, but I am one. I cannot do everything, but I can do something. And what I can do, I ought to do. And what I ought to do, by the grace of God, I shall do.

The shortest distance between two points is often unbearable.