Andy Weir Quotes

Conclusion: I don't need the water reclaimer at all. I'll drink as needed and dump my waste outdoors. Yeah, that's right, Mars, I'm gonna piss and shit on you. That's what you get for trying to kill me all the time.

People will trust a reliable criminal more readily than a shady businessman.

If I could have anything, it would be a radio to ask NASA the safe path down the Ramp. Well, if I could have anything, it would be for the green-skinned yet beautiful Queen of Mars to rescue me so she can learn more about this Earth thing called “lovemaking.

Technically it’s “Carl Sagan Memorial Station.” But with all due respect to Carl, I can call it whatever the hell I want. I’m the King of Mars.

From this, I concluded the following: 1. I’ve been in a dust storm for several sols. 2. Shit.

It's a weird feeling, scientific breakthroughs. There's no Eureka moment. Just a slow, steady progression toward a goal. But man, when you get to that goal it feels good.

Think they’re going to forget that?”
“You asked my opinion. Don’t like it? Go fuck yourself.”
“You’re such a delicate flower, Annie. How’d you end up NASA’s director of media relations?”
“Beats the fuck out of me,” Annie said.

"Přicházela noc. "Jaké to asi je?" uvažoval. "Zůstal tam trčet. Myslí si, že je úplně sám a že jsme ho hodili přes palubu. Jak se to může podepsat na lidské psychice?"
Otočil se zpátky k Venkatovi. "Zajímalo by mě, co se mu právě teď honí hlavou."

DENÍKOVÝ ZÁZNAM: SOL 61

Jak může Aquaman ovládat velryby? Jsou to přece savci! Nedává to smysl."

I can ever prove it was you, I’ll find a way to fire you for it,” Teddy warned. “Sure.” Mitch shrugged. “But if I wasn’t willing to take risks to save lives, I’d…” He thought for a moment. “Well, I guess I’d be you.

Good. Proud. I am scary space monster. You are leaky space blob.” He points to the breeder tanks. “Check tanks!

It’s a strange feeling. Everywhere I go, I’m the first. Step outside the rover? First guy ever to be there! Climb a hill? First guy to climb that hill! Kick a rock? That rock hadn’t moved in a million years! I’m the first guy to drive long-distance on Mars. The first guy to spend more than thirty-one sols on Mars. The first guy to grow crops on Mars. First, first, first!

This is happy! Your face opening is in sad mode. Why, question?

LOG ENTRY: SOL 381 I’ve been thinking about laws on Mars.

Yeah, I know, it’s a stupid thing to think about, but I have a lot of free time.

There’s an international treaty saying no country can lay claim to anything that’s not on Earth. And by another treaty, if you’re not in any country’s territory, maritime law applies.

So Mars is “international waters.”

NASA is an American nonmilitary organization, and it owns the Hab. So while I’m in the Hab, American law applies. As soon as I step outside, I’m in international waters. Then when I get in the rover, I’m back to American law.

Here’s the cool part: I will eventually go to Schiaparelli and commandeer the Ares 4 lander. Nobody explicitly gave me permission to do this, and they can’t until I’m aboard Ares 4 and operating the comm system. After I board Ares 4, before talking to NASA, I will take control of a craft in international waters without permission.

That makes me a pirate!

A space pirate!

I started with a large rigid sample container (or “plastic box” to people who don’t work at NASA).

"Does that mean it's not no? Is that another yes? Now I'm confused.
"No?" I ask
"No" he says in Eridian.
"So, 'yes'?"
"No, yes."
"Yes?"
"No. No."
"Yes, yes?"
"No!" he balls a fist at me, clearly frustrated.
Enough of this interspecies Abbott and Costello routine."