Oscar Levant Quotes

Roses are red, violets are blue, I'm schizophrenic, and so am I.

As a rule I never read bad reviews about myself because my best friends invariably tell me about them.

The other night my daughter Lorna reminisced about the time I regressed to complete infantilism. We were having dinner and tapioca pudding was served. A wild glint came into my eyes and in the presence of my wife and children I shrieked at the top of my voice, “I love this more than anything in the world!” I had to be withdrawn from tapioca pudding slowly. It was one of the few times I wasn’t committed to achieve withdrawal.

What the world needs is more geniuses with humility, there are so few of us left.

It'd be nice to please everyone but I thought it would be more interesting to have a point of view.

Strip away the phony tinsel of Hollywood and you'll find the real tinsel underneath.

When I was in my prime, I was an egomaniac and didn’t allow my wife to buy the best sardines–the King Oscars–which bear my name. I felt there should be only one king in my house.

I envy people who drink — at least they know what to blame everything on.

Every time I look at you I get a fierce desire to be lonesome.

Strip away the phony tinsel of Hollywood and you will find the real tinsel underneath.

Ballet is the faeries' baseball

I had always resented sleep as an intrusion on my nocturnal self-pity

I’ve stepped on too many toes on the way down.

Now that Marilyn Monroe is kosher, Arthur Miller can eat her.

I once said cynically of a politician, "He'll double-cross that bridge when he comes to it."