Robert Asprin Quotes

Oh. I was beginning to worry."
"You do that," Kit laughed. "I like it better when you're worried. Proves you're thinking."
She put out a pink tongue. "You're mean and horrible. Why does everybody else like you?"
Kit scratched his head. "Search me. Guess it's my good looks and charm.

Li was a very honest and honorable man. But when it came to any man’s abiding passion, honesty occasionally went straight out the nearest available window.

It is jihad, Mr. Morgan, a particularly virulent, fundamentalist form of hatred.

Fools have a way of discovering...that the laws of time travel, like the laws of physics, have no pity and no remorse.

So fare the fortunes of men, Skeeter thought bitterly, when seven wolves and a sheep decide what’s for lunch. Perfect democracy: everybody got to vote. Even the lunch.

Once again, Caddrick had failed to use the few brains God had given him.

The more chaotic the world, the greater the need for ritual.

A brave man is one who admits his fear. Only a fool believes himself invincible.

Education," he smiled, "is never a waste of time.

Skeeter thought dark, vile thoughts at bureaus and the bureauc-rats that ran ’em.

What?" Jenna came out of her chair so fast, it crashed over. "Are you insane?"
"No," Skeeter said mildly, "although I know a few people who might argue the point.

Kit chuckled. “You, Bull Morgan, are a wicked judge of human character.”
“Hell, Kit, thought you’d figured it out by now: all human character is wicked. Just varies in degree is all.”

Playing God was a sweetly addictive game.

Small towns were terrible places to grow up with world-sized dreams—especially when those dreams were the only things you had left to hold onto.

All the years he’d spent fooling himself into thinking that what he did was correct was simply time wasted from his life, on delusions and fantasies that kept him from seeing what he was and where he was inevitably headed with genuine clarity.