What disturbs men's minds is not events but their judgements on events: For instance, death is nothing dreadful, or else Socrates would have thought … - Epictetus

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What disturbs men's minds is not events but their judgements on events: For instance, death is nothing dreadful, or else Socrates would have thought it so. No, the only dreadful thing about it is men's judgement that it is dreadful. And so when we are hindered, or disturbed, or distressed, let us never lay the blame on others, but on ourselves, that is, on our own judgements. To accuse others for one's own misfortunes is a sign of want of education; to accuse oneself shows that one's education has begun; to accuse neither oneself nor others shows that one's education is complete.

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About Epictetus

Epictetus (c. 55 – c. 135 AD), born a slave, was a Greek Stoic philosopher. His words were recorded by his student Arrian in the Discourses and Enchiridion written in the early 2nd-century.

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Also Known As

Native Name: ΕΠΙΚΤΗΤΟΣ
Alternative Names: Epictetus of Hierapolis Epiktetos
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What upsets people is not things themselves but their judgments about the things. For example, death is nothing dreadful (or else it would have appeared dreadful to Socrates), but instead the judgment about death that it is dreadful — that is what is dreadful. So when we are thwarted or upset or distressed, let us never blame someone else but rather ourselves, that is, our own judgments. An uneducated person accuses others when he is doing badly; a partly educated person accuses himself, an educated person accuses neither someone else nor himself.

Additional quotes by Epictetus

As the fire-lights in harbors by a few pieces of dry wood raises a great flame and give sufficient help to ships which are wandering on the sea; so also an illustrious man in a state which is tempest-tossed, while he is himself satisfied with a few things does great services to his citizens.

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هل فُضّل عليك غيرك في دعوةٍ إلى وليمة؛ أو في تكريم: أو اجتماع مجلس؟
إذا كانت هذه الأشياء خيرّا فإن عليك أن تّغبط مَن نالها. أمّا إذا كانت شرا فلا تحزن لأنك لم تَنلها. واعلم أنك لا يمكن أن يُسمح لك بمنافسة الآخرين في الأشياء الخارجية دون أن تستخدم نفس الوسائل للحصول عليها. وإلا فكيف يمكن لامرئ لا يترد على أبواب أي كان ولا يلازمه ولا يتملّقه أن يحظى منه بما يحظى به من يفعل هذه الأشياء؟
إنك لمجحف وجشع إذا كنت تتخلى عن دفع الثمن الذي تُباع به هذه الأشياء، وتريد أن تحصل عليها بالمجان.
حسنٌء بكم الخس؟ بأوبول مثلًا؟ فإذا حظيّ بالخس دافعٌ الأوبول وأحجمتَ أنت عن الدفع وعُدْت من غير خسٌ، فلا تحسبٌ أنه حظيّ بأيّ أفضلية عليك؛ فإن لديه الخس ولديك الأوبول الذي لم تدفعه.
كذلك الأمر في حالتنا هذه؛ أنت لم تُدْعَ إلى وليمة مثل هذا الشخص؛ لأنّك لم تدفع له الثمن الذي يُباع به العّشاء؛ إنه يُباع بالإطراء، يُباع بالتزلّف. أَسْدِ إليه الثمن إذا كان في ذلك مصلحتك. أمّا إذا أردت أن تحتفظ بالثمن وتحظى بالشيء في آن معًا فأنت جشعٌ وأحمق.
أتظن أنك لم تفز بشيء في مقابل العشاء الذي فاتك؟
بل فزت حقا، فزت بإعفائك من تملق من لا تريد أن تتملقه، وإعفائك من تحمل فظاظة الحُجّاب على بابه.

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