Why send roses? Wouldn’t it be more romantic to deliver a d… - Jarod Kintz

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Why send roses? Wouldn’t it be more romantic to deliver a dozen orgasms? For only $19.95, I’ll deliver them to your woman any day of the year. But be sure to book early for Valentine’s Day.

Jarod Kintz

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Groucho Marx Woody Allen Brandon Boyd Steven Wright Margaret Atwood

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Jarod Kintz Day — it’s not just my birthday, but it should be a holiday that’s mandatory to celebrate, punishable by death if you don’t. It’ll be a holiday that honors freedom.

Siamese twins have it great because one can jack off while the other talks dirty.

I've often wondered what makes a relationship last. I guess the best answer is it's the one right after the next to the last one.

Why send roses? Wouldn’t it be more romantic to deliver a dozen orgasms? For only $19.95, I’ll deliver them to your woman any day of the year. But be… - Jarod Kintz

Limited Time Offer

Additional quotes by Jarod Kintz