I was driving to another girl’s house who’s not my girl, an… - Jarod Kintz

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I was driving to another girl’s house who’s not my girl, and I saw a red sign by the road that read, “Wrong Way,” and I thought, I agree. So I turned around and went home.

Jarod Kintz

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Groucho Marx Woody Allen Brandon Boyd Steven Wright Margaret Atwood

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Half of what I write is garbage, but if I don't write it down it decomposes in my head.

Her name is Denise, and she has green eyes and red hair. Well, this week. Last week her hair was dyed blonde, and she had blue eyes. Or maybe that was a different woman. I don’t know. All I know is that she is my soul mate.

As an author, I like self-help, because clapping can be done by myself, for myself. I should buy gloves.

I was driving to another girl’s house who’s not my girl, and I saw a red sign by the road that read, “Wrong Way,” and I thought, I agree. So I turned… - Jarod Kintz

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