ATHENA: There are two sides to this dispute. I've heard only one half the argument. (...) So you two parties, summon your witnesses, set out your proofs, with sworn evidence to back your stories. Once I've picked the finest men in Athens, I'll return. They'll rule fairly in this case, bound by a sworn oath to act with justice.

I think the testimony obviously ought to be sworn testimony. And we ought to go all the way into this and take as much time as we can to reassure the American people that this sort of thing’s not going to happen again in the future.

I shall select judges of manslaughter, and swear them in, establish a court into all time to come. 485 Litigants, call your witnesses, have ready your proofs as evidence under bond to keep this case secure. I will pick the finest of my citizens, and come back. They shall swear to make no judgment that is not just, and make clear where in this action the truth lies.

I do not know how far I ought to sit here and suffer a gentleman at the bar to bring forward parts of the Bible in this way. It is for you, gentlemen of the jury, to say whether you wish to hear them read.

When we are asked to swear in American courts of law — that we will tell “the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth” — we are being asked the impossible. It is simply beyond our powers. Our memories are fallible; even scientific truth is merely an approximation; and we are ignorant about nearly all of the Universe. Nevertheless, a life may depend on our testimony.

Judge: Did you hear that, Mr. Cirroc?

We're going to march forward with our efforts to place the President under oath.

I appeal to your own eyes as my witness and judge.

If I'm elected, I may have to sign your death warrants.

Judge — A law student who marks his own examination-papers.

Tell the FBI that the kidnappers should pick out a judge that Nixon wants back.

I was married by a judge. I should have asked for a jury.

Justice requires that a party should be duly summoned and fully heard before he is condemned.

All ye having business before this honorable Court draw nigh, give your attention and ye shall be heard. No, no. Draw nigh and bend over. They're going to rape you up the butt!