old patterns do not give up easily. they will try to keep pulling you into reactions that lead into repeating the past. but in time, after not feeding them for a while and continually practicing your ability to pause and respond, they weaken and become easier to let go. they may still appear as an option occasionally but will not have the same strength as before. this is the turning point, the shift that changes everything, the leap forward you have been waiting for, the victory when it becomes clear that you have moved

One may reasonably ask: Why do people cling to the values and practices of the past, when they so obviously no longer work? Long-standing thought patterns are hard to overcome because they often appear to serve the interests of the individual, and old ways of thinking are simpler and easier to handle. In a two-valued way of thinking, as in good and bad, right and wrong, love and hate, cause and effect, very little logical analysis is involved.

Recognize defensiveness as an attempt to keep new insights from entering your mental field.

The mind resists change because it wants to remain in the realm of what’s familiar. But when what’s familiar no longer feels good, you must consciously push yourself to practise a new way of being in the world. And when you do so, you’ll begin to emit a new energy from your core, attracting more loving experiences, people and situations into your life.

the mind is inclined to protect itself, but an attitude of defensiveness easily breeds anxiety. out of caution, we fixate on uncertain information and create stories that can lead to unnecessary fear and mental tension. taking a moment to notice when we are jumping to conclusions can save us from worry and grief.

It is not only the hostility of others that may prevent us from questioning the status quo. Our will to doubt can be just as powerfully sapped by an internal sense that societal conventions must have a sound basis, even if we are not sure exactly what this may be, because they have been adhered to by a great many people for a long time. It seems implausible that our society could be gravely mistaken in its beliefs, and at the same time, that we would be alone in noticing the fact. We stifle our doubts, and follow the flock, because we cannot conceive of ourselves as pioneers of hitherto unknown difficult truths. It is for help in overcoming our meekness that we can turn to the philosopher.

Because one does not want to be disturbed, to be made uncertain, he establishes a pattern of conduct, of thought, a pattern of relationship to man etc. Then he becomes a slave to the patter and takes the pattern to be the real thing.

When we recognize that we have a habit of replaying old events and reacting to new events as if they were the old ones, we can begin to notice when that habit energy comes up. We can then gently remind ourselves that we have another choice. We can look at the moment as it is, a fresh moment, and leave the past for a time when we can look at it compassionately.

The mind, as a defense against the volume of today’s communications, screens and rejects much of the information offered it. In general, the mind accepts only that which matches prior knowledge or experience.

Your habitual thinking patterns either encourage you toward excellence or nudge you into weakness.

The human mind has a primitive ego defense mechanism that negates all realities that produce too much stress for the brain to handle. It’s called Denial.

Part of the problem is cognitive laziness. Some psychologists point out that we’re mental misers: we often prefer the ease of hanging on to old views over the difficulty of grappling with new ones. Yet there are also deeper forces behind our resistance to rethinking. Questioning ourselves makes the world more unpredictable. It requires us to admit that the facts may have changed, that what was once right may now be wrong. Reconsidering something we believe deeply can threaten our identities, making it feel as if we’re losing a part of ourselves.

If you don't consciously design and choose your affirmations you are susceptible to repeating and reliving the fears, insecurities, and limitations of your past.

This doesn’t mean suppressing or ignoring the past. The pull to behave in old ways weakens over time as we keep choosing to behave in new ways that honor the present more than the past. How we focus our mental energy can determine the future of our life.