Lionel: And as for your case, don't you worry. I've argued in front of every judge in the state. Often as a lawyer. - Phil Hartman

Phil Hartman [singing]: I hide behind these wigs and this make-up, but tonight, I'm gonna let myself shine through. They're gonna see the real Phil Hartman, TONIGHT!

Ladies and Gentleman of the jury, I'm just a Caveman. I fell in some ice and later got thawed out by your scientists. Your world frightens and confuses me. Sometimes the honking horns of your traffic make me want to get out of my BMW and run off into the hills or whatever. Sometimes when I get a message on my fax machine, did little demons get inside and type it? I don't know. My primitive mind can't grasp these concepts.

Troy: Hi, I'm Troy McClure. You may remember me from such educational films as "Two Minus Three Equals Negative Fun" and "Firecrackers: The Silent Killer".