American writer and lecturer (1888-1955)
Dale Harbison Carnegie [originally Carnagey until 1919] (November 24, 1888 – November 1, 1955) was an American writer, lecturer and the developer of famous courses in self-improvement, salesmanship, corporate training, public speaking and interpersonal skills. Born in poverty on a farm in Missouri, he was the author of How to Win Friends and Influence People, first published in 1936, a massive bestseller that remains popular today. He also wrote a biography of Abraham Lincoln, entitled Lincoln the Unknown, as well as several other books.
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Compared to what we ought to be,” said the famous Professor William James of Harvard, “compared to what we ought to be, we are only half awake. We are making use of only a small part of our physical and mental resources. Stating the thing broadly, the human individual thus lives far within his limits. He possesses powers of various sorts which he habitually fails to use.
When we are right, let’s try to win people gently and tactfully to our way of thinking, and when we are wrong – and that will be surprisingly often, if we are honest with ourselves – let’s admit our mistakes quickly and with enthusiasm. Not only will that technique produce astonishing results; but, believe it or not, it is a lot more fun, under the circumstances, than trying to defend oneself.
كلنا يعلم بوجوب التحلي بدماثه الخلق وحسن معامله الغير , ولكن التطبيق أمر مختلف تماما , وانا لا اتحدث هنا عن المثاليات والخلق الرفيع او اعني تلك الشعارات التي يرددها البعض ” عامل الآخرين بما تحب ان يعاملوك له ” حسنا , ما هو سر صعوبه التوقف قليلا ووضع نفسك مكان الشخص الآخر ؟ ربما لأن هناك قوالب جامدة ترسخت في عقولنا عن الطريق الذي يضمن لنا النجاه . وهي القوالب التي نجد انفسنا رغما عنا نلجأ لها ونلتزم بها . كما انه من الاسهل دائما ان نطلق احكاما عامه .
PRINCIPLE 1 The only way to get the best of an argument is to avoid it. PRINCIPLE 2 Show respect for the other person’s opinions. Never say, “You’re wrong.” PRINCIPLE 3 If you are wrong, admit it quickly and emphatically. PRINCIPLE 4 Begin in a friendly way. PRINCIPLE 5 Get the other person saying “yes, yes” immediately. PRINCIPLE 6 Let the other person do a great deal of the talking. PRINCIPLE 7 Let the other person feel that the idea