So you’ve decided to commit a murder.
Congratulations. Simply by purchasing this volume, you’ve already taken the all-important first step toward a successful homicide of which you can be proud, one that would gain you the admiration of your peers, were they ever to learn of it.
This book will see to it that they don’t.

I'm sure anyone who likes a good crime, provided it is not the victim.

[on people who join the military] As long as the people who kinda wanna go kill other people are going to go kill other people who kinda wanna go kill other people, you're killing all the right people and opening up all the best parking spaces.

Killing makes me feel good.

Estoy seguro que a cualquiera le gusta un buen crimen, siempre que no sea la víctima

I was not a cruel person. I didn't commit murder because I enjoyed causing pain. I had pets all my life and I wanted to be a veterinarian. I never was a bully, or provoked fights, or picked on people weaker than I was.

I am not a killer. I just win - Thoroughly - After all, winning isn't everything but wanting to win is.

What are murderers like? Some of them, have been thoroughly nice chaps.

Nowadays you have to be a scientist if you want to be a killer. No, no, I was neither. Ladies and gentleman of the jury, the majority of sex offenders that hanker for some throbbing, sweet-moaning, physical but not necessarily coital, relation with a girl-child, are innocuous, inadequate, passive, timid strangers who merely ask the community to allow them to pursue their practically harmless, so-called aberrant behavior, their little hot wet private acts of sexual deviation without the police and society cracking down upon them. We are not sex fiends! We do not rape as good soldiers do. We are unhappy, mild, dog-eyed gentlemen, sufficiently well integrated to control our urge in the presence of adults, but ready to give years and years of life for one chance to touch a nymphet. Emphatically, no killers are we. Poets never kill.

A moral assassin," she said with an amused smile.
"Not everyone gets into this business because they like to kill people," he replied.
"Then why do you do it?"
"Because I find all forms of business distasteful," answered Chandler. "This one pays me enough so that I don't have to work very often.

So you’ve decided to commit a murder. Congratulations.

For he who reckons it a pleasure that a man, though justly condemned, should be slain in his sight, pollutes his conscience as much as if he should become a spectator and a sharer of a homicide which is secretly committed.

First, I would like to tell you that I came to carry out the struggle, not to kill people. Even now, and you can look at me, am I savage person? My conscience is clear.

I felt something shift to murder in me. I felt … that I was an outlaw, a psychic outlaw, and I liked it.