Stassi Schroeder Quotes

The only thing that I have holding me back right now is that I have self respect and dignity. Thank god for Kristen, who is unburdened by those anchors.

She is a ass sucker. Sorry. And she's sucking on your ass right now.

Jax shouldn't feel bad about being a sociopath. I mean Tom Sandoval is probably a narcissist. Kristen meets most of the criteria for borderline personality disorder. Ariana has a superiority complex. Katie has anger management issues. Scheana's a hypochondriac. I'm a alcoholic, so he's in good company.

I mean, I'm not really what I've done to you, But I'll take a Pinot Grigio.

It's my birthday, and what I say goes.

Oh, My God, Scheana looks like two butterflies landed on her eyelashes and shit a Crayon.

When I die, I want to be taxidermied and then at my wake, I'm gonna have a glass of wine in my hand and people can come in a photo booth and take of photos with me

That is the ugliest effing wedding dress I've ever seen in my entire life.

I want to make another cocktail.

Scheana's acting like we're close friends and she's telling me all this as if I actually give a fuck.

that, like, I prefer to be a dictator and not part of a democracy.

Ugh, This is why I date poor people. Rich people annoy me.

I am going to crucify her. I'm going to destroy her life. You have no idea.

and I want some fried goat cheese balls.

I'd rather give birth to a dump truck than have that conversation with Lisa again.