Men are funny characters, they must always have something to bemuse them.

One of my friends has these ideas about how we should meet men. "What we should do on Friday night is we will fucking go get fucked up and fuck yeah! We will fucking get fucked up and then we will fucking get tickets to go see the Chippendale's Dancers, fuck yeah! We will fucking get tickets to see the Chippendale's Dancers." I can get gay guys to dance in my house for free.

Men think they may justly do that for which they have a precedent.

What is the point of bad dates if not to have amusing anecdotes for your friends?

A good comedian can say things funny and other guys just say funny things.

If you want to get men to act reasonably, you must set about persuading them in a maniacal manner.

Love will make a man do some funny things, like tightrope walking across a telephone wire, rather than simply picking up the phone to call or text.

Men act badly sometimes without being much worse than others,

The worst aspect of dating from the perspective of many men is how dating can feel to a man like robbery by social custom – the social custom of him taking money out of his pocket, giving it to her, and calling it a date. To a young man, the worst dates feel like being robbed and rejected. Boys risk death to avoid rejection (e.g., by joining the Army)

Some men think because they're afraid to do.

One cannot be always laughing at a man without now and then stumbling on something witty.

According as the man is, so must you humor him.

What Men Would Say When Male-Bashing Is Called “Funny,” But Female-Bashing Is Called “Sexist”

Sometimes a man wants to be stupid if it lets him do a thing his cleverness forbids.