Darby Conley Quotes

You can wordify anything if you just verb it.

Oh, Bucky... You're so tiny, yet you're such a massive nutjob...

Is that drooling problem you have due to genetic inbreeding, or are you just really attracted to me? (Example 1 of why Bucky isn't allowed out in public)

You may think you're not pretty enough for me, but I bet I'm pretty enough for the both of us. (Example 4 of why Bucky isn't allowed out in public)

OK, monkey, it's just you and me... I'll give you time to pray to your big, filthy monkey god before I food you.

Do I live here? ...if not, would you still feed me? (Example 3 of why Satchel isn't allowed outside)

A bad writer is just a good writer with writer's block.

Two slugs slithered on a yellow wood,
And sorry that I could not trample both,
Being one trampler, long I stood
And looked them down as fierce as I could
To where they sat in the undergrowth... I will be telling this with a sigh
Somewhere sitting upon a fence:
Two slugs slithered on a yellow wood
And I-- I ate the slug less trampled by,
And that has made all the difference. (Famous cat quotes)

Ohhh, get 'im off me, Satchel!

It is true that you may fool all the people some of the time, you can fool some of the people all the time, but you can not fool all of the people all the time... Dogs, on the other hand, with them all you need to do is flick your wrist and they run off looking for some stupid tennis ball. (Famous cat quotes)

Ohhh, your real name is "Brad"?! I only knew you by what Rob calls you around the house: "big dumb *#%$". (Example 2 of why Satchel isn't allowed outside)

He's an FBI Bomb Dog!!! Do you know how cool that is?! That's the people equivalent of like if Paul Newman was a fire-fighting, baby-kissing rock square!

Now you listen to me, you little party favor, I'm sick of your rotten attitude! I let you call me names and push me around because I consider you my friend, but I'm sure that if I wanted to, I could throw you around like a chew toy!!!

Robert, you are so wrong, philosophers weep at the sound of your voice.

Ahhhh... Satchel, my boy, there's nothin' like a tuna smoothie on a hot summer day...