Groucho Marx Quotes

Marriage is the chief cause of divorce.

This is a GALA day for you. Answer: Well, a GAL a day is enough for me!

She's so in love with me, she doesn't know anything. That's why she's in love with me.

I never go to movies where the hero's tits are bigger than the heroine's.

You can leave in a huff. Or you can leave in a minute and a huff.

Getting older is no problem. You just have to live long enough.

Outside a dog, a book is man's best friend. Inside a dog it's too dark to read.

i miei progetti sono ancora in Embrione: non so se ci sei mai stato, è un sobborgo della metropoli delle pie illusioni. Attualmente sono immerso anima e corpo in Casablanca, un'avventura appassionante. Mi alzo ogni mattina alle sette, sferro alla sveglia un calcio nei cosiddetti e volo allo studio. ...

Humor is reason gone mad.

A man is only as old as the woman he feels.

I don’t want to belong to any club that would have me as a member.

Outside of a dog, a book is man's best friend. Inside of a dog, it's too dark to read

Most young women do not welcome promiscuous advances. (Either that, or my luck's terrible.)

Do you mind if I don't smoke?

While money can't buy happiness, it certainly lets you choose your own form of misery.