W. C. Fields Quotes

Hell, I never vote for anybody, I always vote against.

If at first you don't succeed, try, try again. Then quit. No use being a damn fool about it.

I am free of all prejudice. I hate everyone equally.

I once spent a year in Philadelphia, I think it was on a Sunday.

I cook with wine, sometimes I even add it to the food.

I've never hit a woman in my life. Not even my own mother.

Nunca bebo agua, me preocupa que pueda convertirse en un hábito.

I was in love with a beautiful blond once. She drove me to drink. That's the one thing I'm indebted to her for.

Children should neither be seen nor heard from – ever again.

Remember, a dead fish can float downstream, but it takes a live one to swim upstream.

Start every day off with a smile and get it over with.

I'd rather have two girls at twenty-one each, than one girl at forty-two.

Here lies W.C.Fields. I'd rather be living in Philadelphia.

I always keep some whiskey handy in case I see a snake...which I also keep handy.

Some contemptible scoundrel stole the cork from my lunch ...